Wednesday, September 9, 2020

Geez, I hate Coronavirus!

We visited Brandee and family in March over spring break and met our new granddaughter. That was the last week of normal life. Because of this stupid China Virus, we've been 'quarantined' and masked and I've pretty much just been mad about the whole thing. My lifestyle hasn't actually changed that drastically since I'm a homebody anyway and Tim's work still went on. We have gone to the actual church building for church on Sunday one time since March, and it was ridiculous. We had to wear face coverings and weren't allowed to sing the hymns along with the piano. We've done 'at-home' church mostly. 

Anyway, enough about the weirdness. I've been thinking a lot (since there's so much time!) about a lot of things. Tim's mother passed away in May and one of the things I thought about is that LIFE IS QUICK! It goes by so fast! There's so many things on my someday-I-want-to-do list and I should just start getting them done.

I recently read a blog post about a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying (by Bronnie Ware). I might buy the book; I might not, but the top 5 list is interesting. 
1) I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2) I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
3) I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5) I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Interesting, right? What do you think? 

Those of you who know me, know that I love the power of words and the importance of choosing the correct words for communication. Lots of thoughts here, but stick with me. I first thought "I wonder what the difference is between regret and disappointment? When would one be more appropriate than the other?" Then I though about the theory that anger is actually not an emotion; there is a feeling beneath the anger that is that actual emotion. I thought about me being mad about this dumb virus and what I realized is that I'm disappointed, saddened, upset, anxious, and distrustful. That's a lot of emotions! I'm disappointed in the things in the world that have changed that didn't need to. I'm sad that there were things that we couldn't (and still can't!) do, like have a church funeral for my mother-in-law or visit our new grandchild at the hospital. I'm upset that we haven't been able to attend the IndyCar races so far this season (thank goodness they are still racing and we can watch on TV!). I'm anxious about quantity of "information and reporting" about the dumb virus and the number of people who proclaim "the truth". I'm ending up so distrustful of other people - was that sneeze the virus? 

So, back to the subtle difference between regret and disappointment. 
Regret - noun - a feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over something that has happened or been done.
Disappointment - noun - sadness or displeasure caused by the nonfulfillment of one's hopes or expectations. 
It seems like either of these two words could be used in most instances. I think if the above mentioned book was titled The Top Five Disappointments of the Dying, it would have a different meaning - maybe more like the regrets were things that they themselves could've changed or done differently, as opposed to the disappointments that happen in life just because that's the nature of life!

I have thought and thought about regrets and disappointments, and in my life there's been loads of disappointments - in fact, that usually is the base of my anger - that I'm disappointed in someone's behavior (or my own). Comparatively, there hasn't been as many regrets.


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